tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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