Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
When are your genitals available?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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