"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I think I am morally bankrupt
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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