you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
