ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
We left an ass print on the piano.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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