They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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