I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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