Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
