Are we in a gay sports bar?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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