you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
should my penis look like a turkey
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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