It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
