I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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