Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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