You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
