**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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