TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
