the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Mom said you looked used
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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