It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
