Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
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