My brain says no but my pants say off.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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