u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
