I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
