I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
