i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
