She announced her abortion via fbk
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
