but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I cut my penus on the lid.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
