He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
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