sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
