Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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