he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
