Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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