Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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