I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize