Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
3 2 1 whiskey
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
