can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize