My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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