There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Then you guys just all showered together...?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
