And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
