TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
