not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Terrible idea I love it
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
