Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
