I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
