What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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