theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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