Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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