are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
