I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
