google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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