Where is the hickey?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
