I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
